


Science Fiction Double Feature

by spinner33



Series: CM - Season Four [1]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Homophobia, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-10
Updated: 2015-10-10
Packaged: 2018-04-25 17:18:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4969597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spinner33/pseuds/spinner33
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Reid gets creative when dealing with asshole LEOs.  Reid and Hotch discover that they share an affection for a particular cult movie.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It wasn’t until Reid walked into the BAU conference room and set his bag down in a chair that he realized he hadn’t changed clothes. He was in faded, loose jeans, a thin, well-worn teeshirt, and slip-on loafers that were falling to pieces. He had been stretched out on the divan, spending the day with a pile of DVDs and a bowl of popcorn, when his cell phone rang. Aaron Hotchner was commanding Reid’s immediate presence at work. Immediate presence – those had been Hotch’s exact words – and Reid was not going to trifle with his unit chief when he was in that kind of mood.

This was about when everyone else realized Reid hadn’t changed clothes either, everyone including Hotch. All heads present popped up from the folders and iPads, and fell hard on Spencer. Aaron’s dark eyes trailed Reid up and down, and back up again. Reid felt absolutely naked under that penetrating gaze. He curled his long fingers around the edge of the hem of his shirt and gazed shyly at the floor.

“Did I wake you?” Hotch asked, his rich, deep voice fighting between amusement and unexpected pleasure. He unconsciously licked his lips and studied Reid’s body again.

Garcia walked into the room, her hair in a spiky bun. Her eyes landed on Reid and the large, lusty red mouth emblazoned across his chest, and she lit up brightly.

“Reid! Rocky Horror!?!” Penelope squealed excitedly, actually jumping up and down once or twice. Hotch snapped his head around and gave her a dark look.

“Later,” Hotch growled.

“Oh My God! I’m so excited! I’m so…..we have so much to talk about, later,” Garcia babbled, dodging Hotch’s malevolent expression and quickly taking her seat.

“Later,” Reid agreed, taking his seat as well as he dodged Prentiss’s knowing grin.

“So, not a ‘virgin’ after all, are we?” Emily whispered. Reid scrunched down in his seat and nearly folded up trying to keep everyone from staring at him.


	2. Chapter 2

Hotch let his attaché fall to the floor, let his body sink into the easy chair. The house was quiet tonight – hot and quiet. It felt suffocating to be here alone without Jack and Haley. He sipped his glass of water and leaned his head against the back of the chair, staring up at the ceiling and heaving up a deep sigh.

He was having trouble clearing the case from his head – six dead women in and around Prattville, Alabama was bad enough, but having to deal with the obnoxious local police force had nearly made Hotch lose his cool. Very nearly. Oh, there had been other days and other cases when he had wanted to pack his things and tell the locals to deal with their own fucking problems, but few were as bad as this time had been.

Two of the three of the local deputies had spent the entire six days of the FBI’s presence doing everything in their power to make Dr. Reid feel unwelcome and uncomfortable, up to and including constant snide remarks, taking and hiding his satchel from him, and then cornering him alone in a back room of the police department while everyone else was out. Those two knuckle-dragging evolutionary-throwbacks had made Reid so jumpy he couldn’t concentrate on the case, let alone on capturing the unsub.

Rossi had nearly come to blows with one of the morons, but he had backed away from the deputy when Hotch had returned unexpectedly to the police station. Morgan had taken to being by Reid’s side at all times, because he too had noticed how the local deputies were making the doctor uncomfortable. In the final chase that had resulted in the unsub’s capture, Prentiss had managed to utterly destroy one of the brand-new patrol cars by wrecking it into the other brand-new patrol car, and she had done so with a kind of vengeful glee that Hotch had found almost disturbing. No one had come to Hotch with any reasons for this wild and uncharacteristic behavior, but he was willing to bet it had to do with whatever had gone down between Reid and the two deputies when they had him cornered in the back room at the police station.

The question was how to get Reid to talk to him about the incident. Hotch had a couple ideas on that though.


	3. Chapter 3

“No, the Metro was delayed. I literally walked in the door, and you called, and now there’s someone at the door. Morgan, it’s really nice of you to check up on me, but I’m fine. You don’t need to come babysit me. Hold on a sec. I’m opening the door. Oh! It’s Hotch. What? Did you two plan this?”

Reid was holding his phone to one ear as he swung the door wide to find Aaron Hotchner on the other side of the portal. Hotch gave a quiet wave, nudging his way into the small apartment filled with books as Reid fiddled with the deadbolt and almost dropped the phone. He had put his go-bag by the door, and he was wearing the same clothes as on the plane – tan slacks, brown shirt, dark brown sweater.

“Morgan, you’re on speaker,” Reid said, handing the phone to Hotch and closing the door, flicking the deadbolt back and forth, back and forth, before the bolt shot out and remained in place. “Did you hear me? Hotch is here. What are you two up to? I promise I’m okay. Are you listening?”

“I’m listening,” Morgan answered. “I’m just not believing you.” 

“Nothing happened. Okay?"

“Reid, don’t lie to me,” Morgan rumbled. “I know what I saw, and that was not nothing.”

“Morgan, I can take care of myself. I got it covered. Not my first rodeo with their type.”

“Okay, Pretty Boy. If you don’t want to talk now, we can talk later. I’m here for you.”

“Thanks,” Reid gave a small, shy smile.

“I’ll let you go. Tell Hotch not to keep you up past your bedtime,” Morgan mused. 

“Bye now. See you Monday.”

“See you Monday, Morgan,” Hotch echoed, disconnecting the call. He gave the phone back to Reid, and watched Spencer slip the device onto the tall table with the phone charger. “So, aren’t you going to tell me?” Hotch asked.

Reid turned around from plugging in the phone, and backed up against the front door.

“Tell you what?” Reid asked, eyes on the floor, hands behind his back.

“When is your bedtime?” Hotch worked up a smile. Reid raised his eyes and tucked his chin closer to his chest.

“What brings you to my neck of the woods, Bossman?” Spencer asked.

“Dinner. Movie. Subtle interrogation to determine if I need to bring extra personnel to keep you safe from local law enforcement on future cases in particular states.”

Aaron smiled and handed Reid two bags full of big, flat, take-out boxes, and patted him gently on one shoulder.

“Yeah, that was subtle. Real subtle,” Reid laughed. 

“Extra chili or lime?”

“What did Morgan tell you?”

“Morgan didn’t tell me anything,” Hotch replied. “Which way is the kitchen? Unless you want to eat chicken enchiladas and burritos with your fingers?”

“Go sit down. I’ll scare up some clean silverware,” Reid sighed, pointing Hotch towards the divan and the tv. Hotch maneuvered around stacks of books and headed to the living room. He heard clanking and crashing, as if Reid was taking dishes out of the dishwasher and slipping them up into the cabinets as quickly as possible. Spencer returned to the front room with clean knives and forks, and carrying two beers.

They were a few bites into the food, and had waved off a movie in exchange for the local news, when Reid dove a fork into Hotch’s foam plate and stole a bite of his dinner.

“Maybe I should have asked for lime chicken? Really good. The extra chili is fabulous too. Did you get a carryout menu, maybe?” Spencer asked hopefully, climbing over Hotch to reach the plastic bags on the floor when Aaron pointed in that direction. Hotch put a hand up on the small of Reid’s back to steady Spencer. Aaron almost dropped both the food and the doctor as Spencer slid over one knee and then the other, chasing after the plastic bag. Aaron tried desperately not to watch that cute little butt moving up and down, and back and forth.

“Christ, Reid. Sit. I’ll get it. Sit,” Hotch commanded, grabbing Reid’s hips and putting him down on the other half of the sofa and in order to retrieve the bag. While Reid was investigating the menu in great detail, Hotch took a bite of Spencer’s enchilada. “That is pretty incredible,” he agreed.

Reid laughed softly and patted Hotch’s chest with a napkin before getting up off the sofa and heading for his phone by the front door.

“They’re going on speed dial,” Reid said. Hotch dabbed the sauce off his casual polo and continued eating, watching Reid come back into the living room. They bumped knees as Reid went by between the coffee table and the sofa instead of going all the way around the sofa.

“So,” Hotch began, chewing, nibbling.

“So?” Reid asked, putting down the menu and the phone, and picking up his food again. Hotch reached over and stole a second bite. Spencer smiled indulgently at him. Hotch picked up a third bite, and pushed it into Reid’s mouth.

“What am I not supposed to know about, and what didn’t happen?” Hotch asked.

“I like the slight touch of lime and jalapeno in the corn tortillas.”

“Reid.”

“Nothing happened. The deputies were tormenting me about my ‘purse’. Asking me if I had any tampons they could borrow. The usual over-aggressive macho reactions that I inevitably bring out in Alpha males who are terrified of their own latent homosexual leanings.”

“ ‘Not your first rodeo’?” Hotch asked.

“I deal with comments like that all the time. I don’t run to you every time someone upsets me because I don’t want you to think I’m a whiner. I used to get more upset, but I have gotten better about not letting it get to me,” Reid shrugged. “Maybe it’s because Morgan teases me like that a lot, not in a mean way, but… you know? In his own special way, he’s desensitizing me to the intentional cruelty from others.”

“Why didn’t you come to me when the deputies stole your purse? Satchel,” Hotch corrected himself, flushing red. Reid gave him a defensive frown.

“Because I didn’t want their personal issues with me to interfere with our need to solve the case as quickly as possible. Lives were at stake. I’m a big boy, Hotch. I can deal with assholes. I don’t need you or Morgan beating up every LEO who looks at me sideways. Thanks for being protective, but I can handle myself.”

“Sounds to me like Morgan thought a lot more than looking sideways was going on.”

Reid dropped his eyes, and he was biting his bottom lip. “I’m okay. They didn’t hurt me.”

“If it’s really nothing, then you can tell me all about it. Now,” Hotch said, putting down his plate and gently thumbing Reid’s shoulder.

“Hotch, it’s not the first time I’ve been groped by a stranger,” Reid whispered, looking away. Hotch inhaled loudly and stood up from the divan.

“REID!!” Hotch exclaimed, drawing Spencer to his feet, clutching him by his shoulders, shaking him. “THOSE BASTARDS WERE GROPING YOU?! WHY THE HELL DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?!” he shouted.

Reid cringed back from the sound and ducked sideways.

“Because I didn’t want you to over-react?” Spencer offered timidly. He fell backwards when Hotch let go of him and hurried for the door.

“I’m getting on the phone right now! No! I’m getting on the next plane back down there, and when I get my hands on those sons of bitches, they’ll wish they’d never been born!”

“Hotch, no,” Reid pleaded, taking Hotch’s arms and holding Aaron back as he clawed at the recalcitrant deadbolt.

“…..can’t believe they would…..” Hotch bellowed.

“Listen to me. No. No. No. This is why I didn’t tell you. This is why I didn’t tell Morgan either. You stop it right now. Do you hear me? Stop it, Aaron. Stop it.”

Hotch stopped mid-rage and focused on Reid. Aaron tugged Spencer into his arms, hugging him tight, petting his hair, stroking his waist.

Reid spoke softly against Hotch’s neck, tentatively hugging him back. “Please. I don’t want you to do anything.”

“But they hurt you.” “Hotch. I’m fine. Let it go.” 

Aaron held Reid even closer. He wasn’t aware how close, and he certainly wasn’t aware he had his nose in Reid’s ear, at least until he heard Reid gulp and felt the motion of his throat moving. Reid was patting Hotch gently and soothingly on the back.

“Hotch? It’s okay. Come sit down. Your food will get cold. Eat. Watch a bit of tv. Quit being a mother hen.”

“Next time, you tell me when stuff like this happens, and I will handle it on the spot,” Hotch said, taking Reid’s chin in his thumb and forefinger.

“I hope there is no next time,” Reid replied, suddenly staring at Hotch’s mouth, unable to look anywhere else. Hotch rubbed Spencer’s chin tenderly before letting go of him. For a fleeting second, Reid looked so disappointed.

“Sorry I shouted at you,” Hotch offered.

“Would you like more beer?” 

“Yes, please,” Hotch answered. 

Reid returned from the kitchen with two more beers, and sat tentatively next to Aaron on the divan. Hotch was picking at his food, having lost his appetite. He was absolutely aching with guilt because he hadn’t picked up on how serious the situation in Alabama had been. Maybe Reid hadn’t come to him because he was worried Hotch didn’t care.

Hotch finished the first beer, set down the bottle, and reached for the second one, only to encounter an unexpected bottle cap. Reid sat up straighter, and hunted around under the cushions to find the bottle opener where he had dropped it before.

“I really can take care of myself,” Reid said, opening the beer for Hotch and setting the cap and the opener on the coffee table.

“I know you can,” Aaron offered, not wanting to hurt Reid’s ego, but knowing in his heart of hearts that if Morgan hadn’t happened into that police station when he had, then much worse things might have not happened which Reid would not have admitted to either.

“I took care of those two. Don’t you worry,” Reid confided.

“How did you take care of them?” Hotch wondered when he saw the crooked smile Reid was fighting. “I should have known something was wrong when you didn’t come to breakfast this morning. Where were you?”

“I was busy,” Reid whispered.

“How were you busy?” Hotch asked.

“I asked Garcia to help me hack into the police station network, so I could use their IPS to build multiple profiles for the deputies in question on dubious and sleazy dating websites,” Reid whispered, a naughty smile lighting up his eyes. “Used their real names and work phone numbers. They should be getting all kinds of calls soon.”

“What sort of profiles? What sort of dating websites?” Hotch whispered back.

“The less you know, the better. Plausible deniability,” Spencer cackled playfully, taking a long slurp of beer. “May I have another bite?” he pleaded, poking his fork at Hotch’s plate.

“Help yourself. Let’s watch a movie,” Hotch said, picking up the remote and clicking it towards the tv. The muted newscast disappeared, and giant red lips appeared on a black screen.

“Oh God,” Reid blushed, reaching across Hotch and trying to get the remote from him. Aaron grinned as he held it far left, far right, far up, and far across, batting away Reid’s groping hands, squirming around when Spencer spilled into his lap chest to chest and continued fighting for the remote.

“No, no, no. I wanna watch this. I haven’t seen it in such a long time,” Hotch insisted.

“You… You… you’ve seen it?” Reid squeaked, sitting down unexpectedly on one of Hotch’s thighs.

“What? You think I was born in a suit and tie behind my desk at work? I haven’t always been this serious,” Aaron denied, putting the remote down behind and underneath the sofa. “Get comfy, and we’ll sing along together,” he said, grabbing Reid by the hips and putting the thin man out of his lap.

“I guess you must have been a more relaxed person in college. Did you ever dress up for midnight showings?” Reid asked. 

“Did I?” Hotch grinned. “What do you think?”

Reid stared sideways at Hotch, and a thin grin took over his face. “Brad?" 

“Am I that obvious?” Hotch worried. Reid cackled, shaking his head and trying not to giggle any louder.

“Did Haley dress up as Janet?” Spencer asked.

“Yes, she did. What about you? Who did you dress up as?” Hotch wondered.

“Oh no,” Reid shook his head. “That information is classified. Sorry,” he laughed, giving Hotch one of the blankets from the back of the sofa and snuggling up tightly under the other one, putting his feet on the edge of the cushions and resting his chin on his knees.

“Confess,” Hotch prodded Reid’s ribs tenderly from both sides.

“Stop poking me,” Reid growled, laughing. He dropped his feet to the floor and reached for the tv remote to turn up the sound. Hotch found it vaguely comforting that even a genius with a 187 IQ could not figure out how to program a universal remote. “You promised you’d sing,” Reid reminded Hotch, watching him intently.

“Yes, I promised,” Hotch agreed. “Riffraff?” he asked. 

“Nope,” Reid whispered.

“Magenta?”

“Once or twice, but not primarily.”

“It’s a small cast, Reid. I’ll guess eventually.”

“You just might,” Reid chuckled. “Would you like a clue?”

“Yes,” Hotch nodded. Spencer smiled at him. “Well?” Aaron asked, still waiting.

“But I gave you one already. Would you like another?” Reid teased. 

“Yes.” 

“Say please,” Reid cajoled. 

“Please.”

“You could guess without any help. Don’t judge a book by its cover.” 

Hotch’s mouth fell open. “You dressed up as Frank?” he gasped. 

“So it is possible to shock you!” Reid beamed happily. Hotch gawped at him. “Sing for me?” Spencer pleaded.

Hotch swallowed back his shock and searched for his voice, trying to remember lyrics from two decades ago, wondering all the while at the familiar stranger by his side.


End file.
